There are people who want nothing to do with Christianity because they were mistreated by someone
who claimed to be a Christian. Perhaps they had a neighbor who spoke about Jesus but lived with anger,
dishonesty, cruelty, or hypocrisy. Perhaps someone attempted to “lead them to Christ,” but when they
did not respond as expected, that person became insulting, manipulative, or sexually inappropriate.
Experiences like these cause real wounds. They can leave a person thinking:
“If that is what Christianity looks like, I want no part of it.”
I understand that reaction. When someone approaches us in the name of Christ and then betrays our
trust, the hurt goes deeper. They have not merely behaved badly—they have misrepresented the One they
claimed to serve.
But before you walk away from Jesus, please consider this:
Do not judge Jesus by the conduct of someone who refuses to live like Him. Judge Christianity by
Christ Himself.
A Christian Name Does Not Guarantee Christian Character
Calling yourself a Christian does not automatically make you a faithful follower of Christ.
Jesus warned us that false believers and false teachers would exist. He said:
“Ye shall know them by their fruits.”—Matthew 7:16
Jesus did not say we would recognize His followers merely by their words, church attendance, religious
jewelry, or online profiles. He said we would recognize them by their fruit—the visible evidence of their
character.
Does their life demonstrate love, patience, honesty, faithfulness, humility, and self-control? Or does it
reveal manipulation, selfishness, hatred, sexual immorality, and deceit?
A person can speak the name of Jesus while living in direct rebellion against everything Jesus taught.
When someone uses Christianity to gain another person’s trust and then makes perverted sexual
requests, that is not Christian love. It is manipulation and lust hiding behind religious language.
It should be recognized for what it is and rejected.
Jesus is not honored by such behavior. He condemns it.
Jesus Is Not the Person Who Hurt You
People fail. Ministers fail. Churches sometimes fail. Those failures can be painful, and they should never
be dismissed or covered up.
But Jesus has never lied to you, manipulated you, abused you, or treated you as an object.
Look at the way Jesus treated people in the Gospels. He showed compassion to the rejected. He defended
the vulnerable. He welcomed those whom religious society pushed aside. He spoke truth, but He did so
with a desire to rescue and restore.
Jesus reserved some of His strongest words for religious hypocrites—people who appeared righteous
outwardly while corruption lived inside them.
He said:
“This people draweth nigh unto me with their mouth, and honoureth me with their lips; but their heart
is far from me.”—Matthew 15:8
Jesus understands religious hypocrisy better than anyone. Hypocrites opposed Him, lied about Him,
mocked Him, and helped send Him to the cross.
Therefore, your disappointment with hypocrisy does not place you against Jesus. In fact, Jesus agrees with
you that hypocrisy is wrong.
Keep Your Eyes on Christ, but Keep Wise Boundaries
Keeping your eyes on Christ does not mean pretending people cannot hurt you. It does not mean
remaining in an unsafe relationship or trusting someone simply because that person says,
“I am a Christian.”
Forgiveness does not require foolishness. Faith does not require you to ignore warning signs. You can
forgive someone while maintaining strong boundaries and refusing to give that person another
opportunity to harm you.
Jesus said:
“Behold, I send you forth as sheep in the midst of wolves: be ye therefore wise as serpents, and
harmless as doves.”—Matthew 10:16
We can love people while still exercising wisdom. We can believe in Christ without believing every
person who uses His name.
Examine Jesus for Yourself
If someone has given you a false picture of Christ, I encourage you to open one of the Gospels—Matthew,
Mark, Luke, or John—and examine Jesus for yourself.
Do not begin with the behavior of a neighbor, a preacher, someone from a dating site, or even a family
member. Begin with Jesus.
Listen to His words. Observe His compassion. See how He treated hurting people. Watch Him touch
the untouchable, forgive the repentant, defend the vulnerable, and confront the hypocrite.
Then look at the cross.
Jesus did not merely talk about love. He demonstrated it.
“But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners,
Christ died for us.”—Romans 5:8
Christ did not wait for us to become worthy of His love. He loved us while we were still lost.
He willingly gave His life so that our sins could be forgiven and we could be reconciled to God.
That is the true heart of Christianity.
Imperfect People and a Perfect Savior
Christians are not perfect people. Every genuine believer is still growing, learning, and sometimes
failing. But there is a difference between a believer who stumbles and repents and a hypocrite who
continually uses religion as a disguise.
Our faith is not built upon the perfection of Christians. It is built upon the perfection of Christ.
If you keep your eyes only on people, eventually someone will disappoint you. But when you look to Jesus,
you will find One who is faithful, merciful, holy, and true.
The Bible tells us to be:
“Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith.”—Hebrews 12:2
People may misrepresent Him, but they cannot change who He is.
An Invitation to Look Again
If a person claiming to be a Christian has hurt you, I am truly sorry. What happened to you matters.
Your hurt should not be minimized, and your trust does not have to be given carelessly.
But please do not allow a counterfeit Christian to rob you of the real Christ.
Do not let someone else’s hypocrisy decide your eternal future.
Look again at Jesus—not at the person who failed to resemble Him.
Jesus knows your pain. He understands your mistrust. He is not demanding that you pretend the wound
never happened. He is inviting you to bring that wound to Him.
You may have been disappointed by people, but you have not yet discovered all that Christ is.
He loves you. He died for you. He rose again. And even after everything you have experienced,
His arms remain open.
Do not turn away from Jesus because someone else turned away from His teachings. Look beyond the
hypocrite—and look again at Christ.
Evangelist Mike Cunningham
Mike Cunningham Ministries
